| Contact Info |
| Name: |
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| Email: |
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| Description |
| Gender: |
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| Age: |
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| Where Do You Live? |
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| Ethnicity: |
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| Religious Affiliation: |
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| Hair Colour: |
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| Hair Length: |
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| Eye Colour: |
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| Height: |
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| Weight: |
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| My Style Most Resembles: |
| Catherine Zeta Jones: Classy and Beautiful: | |
| Julia Roberts: Desired By All but is Death for Relationships: | |
| Pamela Anderson: Enough Said: | |
| Reese Witherspoon: Fun-Loving and a Great Sense of Humour: | |
| Angelina Jolie: Scary-Hot and Gets Into Trouble: | |
| Rosie O'Donnel: Thinks She Knows What's Best For Everyone: | |
| Roseanne Arnold: Just Die Already: | |
| I Do Not Resemble Other Humans: | |
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I Frequently Wear:
(All that apply) |
| Glasses: | |
| Contacts: | |
| A Bandana: | |
| A Hat: | |
| A Giant Hat: | |
| A Feather Boa: | |
| Mr. T Style Jewellery: | |
| My Wedding Ring: | |
| An Oversized Foam-Rubber Hand: | |
| The Pelts of Past Boyfriends: | |
| A Shirt Thats Says "I'm with stupid": | |
| Nothing At All: | |
| My Heart on My Sleeve: | |
| A Trophy Heart Around My Neck: | |
| Other: | |
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| Aspirations: |
| Highest Level Of Education Completed: |
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| In Post-Secondary You Major(ed) In: |
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| Current Employment: |
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| Do you Have Any Career Aspirations? |
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| If so, what are they? |
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| Your thoughts on children? |
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| Have You Committed Any Past Criminal Offences? |
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| Are You Mentally Sound? |
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| Your Literary Preferences Include (check all that apply): |
| Ancient Greek Philosophy: | |
| Shakespeare: | |
Any Bestseller | |
| Technical Books: | |
| Fiction Novels: | |
| Where's Waldo?: | |
| The Kraft Dinner Box: | |
| What Does "Literary" Mean?: | |
| I Can Spell My Name! | | |
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| Vices |
| Smoking Habits: |
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| Drinking Habits: |
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| When I Drink, I Tend to Drink: |
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Recreational Drug Use:
(All that apply) |
| None | |
| Smoke Pot Occasionally | |
| Stoner: | |
| Dude... Dude... you... are great! I'm Hungry: | |
| Any Other Illegal Drugs (including cocaine, smack, crack, LSD, Speed, Heroin, "Rave" drugs and Celine Dion): | |
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| Personal |
| I Am: |
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| A Romantic Date Consists of: |
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| I Am A(n)_______ Person: |
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| You Find Out That My 3 Closest Friends Are All Model-Worthy Females, You: |
| Think Nothing Of It: | |
| Accept Them As My Friends: | |
| Try Really Hard to Get Along: | |
| Try To Incorporate Them Into Our Doings: | |
| Talk Down to Them Because "girlfriend" outranks "friend": | |
| Try to Subvert them Out of Your Life: | |
| Wage Full Scale War on Them: | |
| Go Into A Jealous Rage Whenever You Mention Them: | |
| Dump You, Ask One of Them Out: | |
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| Do You Think The Simpsons Is the Greatest Show on Earth?: |
| Yes | |
| Hell Yes! | |
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My Hobbies Include:
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| Writing | |
| Reading | |
| Poetry | |
| Watching TV | |
| Sports | |
| Games | |
| Working Out | |
| Running | |
| Running From People | |
| Harrassing the Ex (Again) | |
| Making Fun of People | |
| Calligraphy | |
| Phone Sex | |
| Replacing Bedposts due to over-notching | |
| Anger Management Courses | |
| Various Other 12-Step Programs | |
| Work, Work and More Work | |
| Trying to Take Over the WORLD! | |
| Other: | |
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| My Reason For Applying is:: |
| I Like His Sense of Humour | |
| I Actually Think He's Hot | |
| He Has His Own Website. I'm Attracted To The Power | |
| The Medication Isn't Working | |
| Other: | |
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| Anything Else You'd Like To Add to His Divinely Porkchoppyness?
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